State vs Symbol: Why Some Emotional Experiences Are Hard to Put Into Words
Some emotional experiences are felt long before they can be understood.
In depth-oriented therapy this distinction is often described as the difference between state and symbol.
A state refers to the immediate emotional and bodily experience occurring in a moment. Symbolisation is the ability to represent that experience in words or images so it can be reflected on.
Psychological change often involves gradually moving from raw emotional states toward the ability to recognise and think about them.
Start here: This article is part of the Understanding Depth-Oriented Therapy Guide, which explores how emotional states, repetition, and reflective capacity shape psychological change over time.
Read the full guide:
Some emotional experiences are felt before they can be understood. Reflective capacity gradually brings those experiences into clearer awareness.
Emotional Experience Often Comes Before Understanding
People sometimes assume that emotions are things we first understand and then feel.
In practice the opposite is often true.
An emotional response may appear as:
A tightening in the body
A sudden sense of unease
Irritation that seems to arrive without explanation
An impulse to withdraw or react
At first these reactions can feel confusing because they appear before words are available to describe them.
This is where the distinction between state and symbol becomes useful.
What Therapists Mean by “State”
A state refers to the overall emotional configuration of experience in a given moment.
It often includes:
Bodily sensations
Emotional tone
Level of arousal
Attentional focus
A sense of safety or threat
States are frequently learned early in life, often before language develops.
Because of this, they are primarily felt rather than explained.
An earlier article explores how these states can later become linked to repeating patterns:
From Pattern to Presence: How Early States Shape What We’re Drawn To
What Symbolisation Means
Symbolisation refers to the mind’s ability to represent emotional experience through language, images, or thought.
For example, someone might move from a vague bodily tension to recognising:
“I think I’m feeling angry.”
Once this shift happens, the experience becomes something that can be reflected on rather than simply reacted to.
Symbolisation allows emotional experience to become thinkable.
When States Cannot Yet Be Symbolised
There are many situations where emotional states exist without clear symbolic representation.
This can happen when:
Emotions were experienced before language developed
Emotional expression was discouraged or unsafe
Anxiety interrupts reflective thinking
When this occurs, the emotional state may still influence behaviour even though its meaning is unclear.
People may notice:
Strong reactions in certain situations
Recurring relationship patterns
Impulses that feel automatic or puzzling
These reactions often make more sense once the underlying state becomes recognisable.
Developing Reflective Capacity
Therapy often helps people gradually develop the ability to recognise and reflect on emotional states.
This capacity is sometimes described as mentalisation or reflective functioning.
As reflective capacity grows, people often become better able to:
Recognise emotional reactions earlier
Tolerate feelings without becoming overwhelmed
Understand patterns that previously felt automatic
This shift from state toward symbol is rarely immediate.
It tends to unfold gradually through repeated experience.
From State to Symbol
At first, someone may only notice that a situation feels uncomfortable.
Later they may recognise the emotional tone involved.
Eventually they may be able to think about what that reaction means in the context of their life.
This gradual movement from state toward symbol allows emotional patterns to become less automatic and more understandable.
It also prepares the ground for the way repetition develops.
How This Connects With the Rest of the Guide
This article explains the difference between emotional states and the ability to symbolise them.
Other articles in the guide explore how these processes influence psychological change.
What Depth-Oriented Therapy Means: An introduction to emotional process in depth therapy
Why Repetition Happens: How emotional states can shape repeating patterns
Mentalisation and Emotional Fragility: How reflective capacity stabilises emotional experience
From Repetition to Integration: How emotional patterns gradually become integrated
Explore more in: Understanding Depth Oriented Therapy
media depth emotion betterhelp reflections quizzesFrequently Asked Questions About Why Some Emotional Experiences Are Hard to Put Into Words
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State refers to immediate emotional and bodily experience. Symbolisation refers to the ability to represent that experience in language or thought so it can be reflected on.
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Some emotional experiences appear before the mind has words for them. Developing symbolic understanding often takes time and reflective capacity.
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Therapy often helps people notice emotional states more clearly and gradually develop the ability to reflect on them rather than reacting automatically.
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Yes. Mentalisation refers to the capacity to understand emotional and mental states in ourselves and others.
Written by Rick Cox, MBACP (Accred)
Psychodynamic Psychotherapist, UK & Online