The Psychology of the Inner Critic: How the Voice Inside You Took Power
Many people describe an internal voice that is harsh, critical, or dismissive. It appears during moments of effort, success, or emotional exposure and can quickly shift attention toward self-doubt or shame.
This voice often feels personal, as though it reflects the truth about who you are. In therapy, we usually view it differently. The inner critic is understood as a psychological response that developed over time, often shaped by earlier emotional experiences.
This article explores how that voice forms and how therapy helps change your relationship with it.
Image symbolising the experience of feeling confined by internal self-criticism.
How the inner critic develops
The inner critic often begins as a way of managing emotional risk.
When someone grows up in an environment where criticism, pressure, or emotional unpredictability is present, the mind can internalise those experiences. Over time, self-criticism becomes a strategy to anticipate judgement or reduce vulnerability.
The logic is often unconscious:
Criticise yourself first
Stay small or cautious
Avoid emotional exposure
Reduce the risk of being hurt
What once served as protection can later become limiting.
The link with anxiety and shame
The inner critic is closely connected with anxiety and shame. Self-attacking thoughts often appear just before or alongside vulnerable feelings.
In practice, this can look like:
Minimising achievements
Apologising excessively
Assuming you are the problem in relationships
Feeling uneasy when recognised or valued
From a psychodynamic perspective, the critic functions as a defence. It keeps attention focused on self-judgement rather than on the feelings underneath, such as sadness, anger, or longing.
How therapy works with the critic
Therapy focuses on understanding when the critic appears and what it is attempting to manage.
This might involve:
Noticing moments of self-attack as they happen
Tracking what feeling or situation triggered it
Understanding the emotional function of the criticism
Developing the ability to stay present without immediately agreeing with it
Over time, people begin to recognise the critic as a part of their psychological history rather than an objective truth.
Developing a different relationship with yourself
Change often happens gradually. The goal is to reduce the authority of critical thoughts.
As emotional capacity grows, people usually find that:
Self-attacks feel less automatic
Shame becomes more manageable
Self-reflection becomes less punishing
Choices feel less driven by fear of failure
The critic often softens when it no longer needs to protect against overwhelming feelings.
A simple reflection
The inner critic usually formed for a reason. Understanding that reason creates space to respond differently.
Therapy offers a structured place to examine this voice and develop a steadier relationship with yourself.
If this reflection resonated, you might explore:
Explore more in depth
FAQ: Understanding the Inner Critic in Therapy
-
It likely developed as a way to avoid rejection, criticism, or punishment early in life, an unconscious strategy to feel safe through self-control.
-
Yes. Therapy helps you understand the function of your critic, regulate the anxiety it defends against, and develop a more compassionate internal dialogue.
-
That’s common. In therapy, you’ll learn to slow the process down, to feel before reacting, so the critic’s voice becomes distinct from your own.
-
Healthy reflection is different from self-attack. The goal isn’t to remove self-evaluation but to remove the shame that drives it.
-
Notice when it speaks and what emotion comes right before it. Beneath every harsh word is a feeling waiting to be felt.
Written by Rick Cox, MBACP (Accred)
Psychodynamic Psychotherapist, UK & Online
